O no, u 2 are dating again?
No. I just masturbate furiously to his picture
You should dream of me :)
I'm going to dream of single life.
Having a conversation over beer pong about a threesome I participated in...it's only Wednesday
when did we get to this "texting at random" level on friendship?
he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
What happened to the watermelon?
You fucked it.
just left a line of flour and citric acid on the dresser for my roommate to find. teach that bastard to steal my coke!
Sad news: I might have to institute a "once-per-day" policy on getting trashed downtown. Sorry, reputation.
Shes sitting on the front porch puking in to the pumpkin she just carved...in the rain. I guess pumpkin spice tequila shots wasnt our best idea.
I come back home for break and my room is full of weed either my parents really love me or they are having more fun then I am in college
I'm sorry, when did "I like your shit" become an acceptable pickup line?
You gotta hand it to him. 6 hours in a new town and he's already fuck someone, had his ass kick by her bf, and rounded up a posse of people to kick this guys ass.
New Mean Girls drinking game: Everytime someone says Africa or Math, chug.
I am not walking across campus just to give you a blow job in the hopes that in return i can study more efficiently.
She's wear your skin crazy! Is it wrong that I'm gonna fuck her 1 more time though?
Randomize
