he was lying next to me and i saw him text "score" to someone.
Nothing says true friendship like 2 people bonding over potentially having AIDS.
I think it is impossible 2 take a person seriously when their last name is Pancake
i dodnt think we hooked up bcause he actually texted me the next day
I'm still trying to figure out how you came back with chinese food, and a spoon covered in icing saying 'cake..'
you should be back in the room by now but just so you know. you passed out at the black jack table and they wheel chaired you out. strip club in about 45 minutes. game face bro.
I'm voting my liver organ of the month. The award ceremony is next weekend.
You wanted to thank my penis. You wanted me to take the condom off so you could touch it and thank it.
Maybe not Elvis quality pharmaceuticals...But some good stuff
He had a small dick anyway. I'm glad I barfed on it.
And then she proceeded to tell us that blowing your brother made her feel like part of the family. At this point you were still pretending to be a cat. Need I give another reason she can't live with us?
He asked me to fly out to Seattle to participate in a week of marathon sex so I'm at the airport now. I'll call you when I get back.
Well, I have no idea where my underwear is, so yea I would say it was a good weekend.
Ya that dick wasn't worth burning a perfectly good pizza.
You live and learn.
i just read a article called "Booze, Drugs, and Bipolar Disorder"... i think someone is writing the memoirs of my life
Randomize
