WHO ATE OUR COOKIES WHAT THE FUCK THOSE WERE GOURMET
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
Listen, i'm watching playoff hockey and eating waffles. i just don't have time for your drama today.
Jenna and Ryan are ranting and raving about child custody. MY VASECTOMY SMILES.
He told me the hand job I gave him this morning was "lovely".
This kid is too lonely to be my drug dealer.
I think I just tested my sobriety limits for unicycling.
im failing my bio class b/c he booty calls me wednesday nights at 6 like clockwork
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
there was so much lube in my brother's closet...
I traded him cumming in my face for a year for a Disney annual pass. One giant leap back for feminism, one small step for the adult child Disney fan.
I just masturbated to the thought of him straight up talking to me. to us having a conversation. What the hell.
YO I WASNT TRYING TO MAKE A PASS AT YOU.... Or Jesus
Was your bare penis on or around my blanket?
Okay so my roommate deals some drugs so whenever he leaves we can hook up, be ready
I didn't know I was the on call booty call damn
Randomize