i lost my life and panties somewhere between the 15th and 16th round of slap the bag.
Yeah he had his two razors labeled "face" and "pubes". Should I be disgusted or impressed?
Jenna and Ryan are ranting and raving about child custody. MY VASECTOMY SMILES.
He fell asleep and they duct taped him to the floor. He's pissed.
i've never seen someone face fit so perfectly in a toilet bowl
You started a dance party so that you could steal their vodka and shouted "sailors out!"
Just saw a 300lb woman fall down. Shes screaming like a beached manatee. Her 120lb boyfriend is trying to push her up. It's like watching an infant try to bench
I want a bunch of melted cheese. or a penis. or a penis covered in melted cheese
I almost bumped into a man wrapped only in a blanket at 10 am
I just remember banging him and then at some point I went and took a shower and went and laid in the closet
I think I swiped left on my soulmate
I passed out with the lights and tv on woke up at 4am SO confused and covered in goldfish so I ate them and went back to bed.. fuck xanax
You can make out without kissing
Explanation needed
i hooked up with all four beatles on halloween get on my level
It's official, I'm not staying in tonight
What caused that decision?
You only live once
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