i bet jesus would rush if he went to usc
Don't you think facebook is a bit pretentious, suggesting friends and all? No facebook, I would NOT like to be friends with a girl whose fiancee I have slept with.
I just rolled a spliff on a dora the explorer tv tray. Preschool education meet afterschool special.
he was humming party in the usa while we were having sex.
you're in nursing school, now tell me what to do about a burned clit.
I just made Jack Daniels snow cones.
nothing says "we're all in this together" like the herpes she passed around to our entire group of friends
Confirm for me that it's be a bad idea to sleep with the 50 year old that's currently hitting on me?
The arresting officer told me "you probably get this a lot, but you look like anthony kiedis".
Just realized how many men I've had sex with for the first time in St. Patty's Day past. Currently sending "HAPPY SEXIVERSARY" texts...
You crossed every boundary on the boundary spectrum last night. You're like the illegal immigrant of drunk actions. No more holiday drinking for you.
all i remember is walking in on u shitting and crying listening to shawty get loose. its safe to say this break up has taken a toll on u
My doctor wrote down abstinence as my form of birth control. #ihavenodatinglife
Cheese, the small of a woman's back, the universe, mountains, vampiric demons, sleep, and dreams.
I can't go to Fassler and not immediately think about you licking a guys wife's butthole in the family restroom
Randomize
