At least make sure they are 18
Why
I wish I could still say I don't know that you taste like bad ice cream.
two of my INSANE ex girlfriends just texted me saying their coming over because im home alone. needless to say, im deleting my twitter.
blow job with a beer in the shower, I just created the ultimate day spa for dudes
she thought the capital of kansas was topanga.
My third nipple is alarmingly under-appreciated.
She's doing shots in her underwear, a fur hat and mittens. I'm never coming home.
dude, i turned on the light and asked if they were ok and they STILL didn't stop. Most determined sex EVER.
I found your doppelganger. same hair, eyes, personality, catch phrases, and penis. it was mind-boggeling.
But think about it. I could put her gold medal around my penis
Im hitting on this chick at a stoplight when all the sudden. i notice this chick blowing some dude in the backseat.
i wore just an American flag as my costume-huge success. 20 people pledged allegiance to my ass including a senior frat boy at the keg. God bless America.
Is eating a dinner of fishsticks and gin mean you're failing at adulthood? I'm asking for a friend.
Wish me luck on my new penis adventure
We were literally making dick jokes with his dick out
That’s the level of friends with benefits I aspire to achieve
Randomize