Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
There's an old bald Japanese dude on the metra next to me. He's drinking MGD on a crowded train, and rocking out way too hard to what may be the same Dallas Green song I'm listening to. Life is sweet.
i honestly don't know why someone didn't cut me off after i broke the ceiling lamp with MY HEAD
We lost Kevin again. Probably kidnapped by fattie 2 or butter-face 2 from last night. We need names and any information you can give us. Last scene with his shoe laces converted into a belt.
Cuz its complicated and I hate complicated and I miss your penis
The chlamydia really affected his face.
Why were you staring at her like that over breakfast?
Because I was eating with a spoon to remind her that she threw up on my hand while she was MAKING me spoon with her after our drunk sex. She got it. Don't worry.
I'm going for high school drunk, you've got 15 minutes to get here.
Don't talk to me about scholarly dedication until you've taken a final in boxers, a bloody tank top and a zip tie to hold your hair back. I wear the most sullied 4.0 crown of all time....
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
blowjobs from left handed girls are noticably better than from righties. these are the most important things I've learned this semester
Steve, that episode of cops where your dealer rear-ended that family is on again.
I came so hard my ears popped.
I love how when he said ecstasy pills both of our heads whipped around like a couple of horned owls.
I no longer have the means to support both a women and an alcohol addiction
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