ur dog is so gonna tell on us one day.
for doing what?
for smoking bowls out on the deck while your parents aren't home.
There's half of a squirrel in the bathtub - i figured you'd be the one to go to.
I don't know at least half of his name. I have officially become a statistic.
Word is he has some crazy hawaiian STD
Need help. Super baked. Stuck on couch. Dying of thirst. Bring paint thinner or something to pry me off. Only thumbs and neck work.
Stop banging my friends. This is getting weird.
Stop being friends with hot 18 year old girls.
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
She yanked on my limp dick and I yelped, to which she slurred something about starting it like a lawn mower
Since when do you jog?
Since hot shirtless guy that lives across the street jogs
Lets just put it this way. Im meeting his nana after a mind blowing orgasm.
Testing the emergency boobs hotline
I'm not gonna ask the guy I've fucked like 3 times if he is insecure about his eyebrows.
Leaves on the ground. Coffee in one hand and your man in my other. Lovely fall morning.
I used your vibrator when you were out of town. Now I know why you always come out of your room smiling.
Saw a sign that said the chorus of never gonna give you up was enough time to wash your hands. Coronavirus has Rick rolled me.
Randomize