U sang "shots, shots, shots" then walked 2 ur top drawer and threw socks everywhere singin "SOCKS, SOCKS, SOCKS!"
his pokemon pajamas? the fact that he was proud of the stretchmarks on his arms? or finding out he has a daughter that went to high school with us? ...you tell me what was the dealbreaker
Well he paid for dinner, so I paid for the Plan B, but the parking ticket I got is totally his responsibility.
He managed to light the Jello on fire...
I want you to tape your fingers together and give me a lobster claw hand job.
Use motel 8. I'll give you my credit card #. i'll pay for it cuz i care about your vagina.
you're not a real person. you're actually just like a box of wine that can talk
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
Challenge: Try to have your balls hanging out in every picture you take tonight
Challenge Accepted
I'm allowing myself one mistake a year. He gets to be 2012.
You don't care if I shave my legs, but you insist I be conscious for sex. Whatever. I really think your priorities are out of whack.
Your brother slept on my deck. There was a key under the mat. Relapse party success.
who is that guy in your bed? he looks like jesus..way to keep it festive
Where do you think your fantastically immense lady-boner for men in uniform comes from?
Social anxiety problems: I just had to get up and change stalls mid-poop because someone sat down in the one next to mine.
Randomize
