he just texted me two pictures of his dick. i feel i should rethink whatever vibe im obviously giving out
so is it as big as he says?
he put a tube of toothpaste next to it as a reference. it looks legit
I wonder what a non-hungover friday at work is like
I cannot take someone's straight and gay virginity in one threesome. It's just too much responsibility.
i think i swapped my keys for drugs last night
I have officially tracked lube all over our house on the bottom of my socks without knowing it. Don't slip when you come in
threw up on my 7.30 AM placement test. Never again
Can't tonight. I'm supposed to get drugs for some college kids. Just doin my part in helping to enlight america's future
Doing a circuit workout and using a power hour playlist for my 1 minute timers. I am getting old. creative, but old.
so i might have figured out why that girl isn't talking to me...I'm 90% confident I didn't give her a pillow when she stayed over >.>
I did a kegel this morning to determine if I had been penetrated during last night's blackout. Nope.
well smoking weed has become a deal breaker for me so I pretty much use "let's go smoke a blunt" as an icebreaker
If he would've shaved his beard when we first broke up, getting over him would've been so much simpler. That asshole.
COME TO THE TOP OF THE MOUNTAIN AND I WILL GIVE YOU MY SAGE ADVICE.
Yes ma'am. I'm attracted to unconventional people, you know that.
True. I can't judge, half of my sexual partners I only know a false first name & a number. We all have our kinks.
I'm not gonna lie, but for some reason I have this strong desire to watch porn with my pint of haagen das.
Randomize
