You should probably wake up already as I have yet another story for you. Teaser? Blood from knife wound. Tequila. Guitar hero. Kitchen counter. Lawyer.
she got pretty angry when i tried to superglue her fingers together.
So how does it feel getting boo'd by the entire 5 guys restaurant
Couldn't get it up. She asked me what she was doing wrong. Didn't have the heart to tell her. I appreciated her willingness to adapt, but she's pretty much gonna look that bad her whole life.
bro, sorry for: trying to put you on fire yesterday, telling the bouncer that it was you that broke the bottles, and to have slept with your sister.
You're probably reading this when you wake up from your "nap" in the front yard. Maybe next week you should go to class, and not start Thirsty Thursday at 9:30 in the morning.
I AM OVERLY HIGH AND OVERLY AWARE OF MY TONGUE IN MY MOUTH
Bro, she used the potato bongs to make French fries after. She's deff a keeper.
I took in his dog. My exboyfriend still calls me for 2 things, blow jobs and animal rescue. I need to end this cycle
When one is stoned and browsing online dating profiles all men sound like serial killers.
But seriously. What possible excuse could I come up with to ditch my parents on Christmas to go fuck him?
Steve watched craig and I have sex from the top level of his cat tower this morning.
In my dream I had to eat so many peanut butter and Nutella sandwiches
Pretty sure keeping my vibrator in the same drawer with the weed makes it work better. I fall asleep almost immedi
it was the kind of sex that I don't even know how my hair extentions are still in
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