so the chest pain/shortness of breath/overdose guy we just took to tm hospital is now running down market street from the police in a gown holding his iv.
Doo rag and shades in the bar. You are missing your future husband.
Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
1 I really miss college walks of shame 2 I think I may have killed this girls cat
You're my spirit guide. This has to do with oatmeal cream pies.
can you come back were all locked out and alyssia's still inside passed out on the floor but more importantly i left a beer in there that's not finished
I DON'T CARE LET'S GET DRUNK AND GO. I STRAIGHTENED MY HAIR DO THIS FOR ME.
IT'S LINGERIE PURCHASED FROM A FLEA MARKET, THE ONLY THING IT'S GOING TO BE POSITIVE FOR IS A TEST FOR HIV
He tried to do the do on me last night and my exact words were "stay away from my princess parts. they're renovating."
Thanks so much for having me, I'm really sorry that I almost caused your dog to catch on fire and also for breaking your doorknob
Someone drank my pedialite!
YOU drank your pedialite. I watched you chase shots with it!
It wasn't until after we began having sex again the next morning I realized I didn't know his name.
i still cant feel my toes or walk straight...its been 2 days.
Finally fucked my buddy's mom!! We are both ten years older and for her it really shows but i hit it!!
Finally hooked up with Ryan. Now I know why they call him “Beast Mode”. So. Many. Orgasms.
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