wat bout pragnant strippers??
I either just heard my neighbors having sex or she really agreed with whatever he was talking about.
as soon as you compare a person to an animal, all sexual interest is out the window
My cousin just asked what abortion is. Happy Holidays.
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
I had his cock in my mouth and he still wouldn't shut up about Star Wars.
We are lost and the only things we have are peanut brittle, cookies and vodka. I think we'll make it.
Road construction signs are deceptively heavy
The beer-amid has reached five feet. Caitlyn has a taser. GTG
It's hard being an adult. And by that I mean it's hard to tell the boy you like who rejected you that you can't share a room with him at white party because you don't want to see him bang other boys.
Just tell your mom you have to go somewhere half naked with a strange man. She'll understand
Exactly best part of my night he took of his shirt and surprise traveler fanny pack
I just remembered that the guy I slept with last night has "USDA PRIME" tattooed on his ass
You know what would have been funny if we got arrested last night? The inventory search of the lock box:\n\nContents:\n1 work ID\n1 33 round Glock magazine\n1 set of keys\n1 vibrator\n2 bags fruit snacks\n1 parking hang tag
you have to get here a cop came into the bar and she looks like Sarah Palin. I think I'm gonna try and bang her
Randomize
