Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
upper decked the toilet at the restaurant that wouldn't let me pee there yesterday
I seriously need to stop naming my lingerie sets after the boys I wear them for. I seriously just asked mom if she put Brett in the dryer
easter eggs filled with ecstasy. it's what jesus would do.
his receeding hairline makes running into him so much less awkward. almost enjoyable actualy
FYI don't ever, ever get a lap dance from a stripper who says " she's having a bad day " at a bachelor party.
Found her in the closet eating mayo out of the jar with a knife
Man, I thought my dick was gonna fall off.
Dude, I didn't even think they made slap bracelets anymore. You okay?
They were scared I was going to get lost last night so they dressed me up as Waldo so someone would always find me.
I lost the back to your old name tag last night in a girls shirt. It got me a view of some titties though, I guess in some way you're still doing your brotherly deeds
Thanks for setting a pic of your balls as my desktop background. You'll find you're cc'ed on the mass email of it.
I know he's gay. But if he touches my vagina I'm human centipeding his face. Sorry not sorry
You ran into the tattoo shop screaming PIERCE MY TITIES
Sorry for yelling at you, I'm just really emotional about missing comicon.
I accidently sent a dick pic to the group chat with her family. Right after they all said it was a pleasure having me for dinner. Wana drink with me?
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