You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
were having a shit on karen session at work but then she walked in so we used code names instead and she tried to join in like she knew them
What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
i am not allowed to pick the men i sleep with anymore
the entire lecture hall sighed when the prof announced that there will be an exam on 4/20
It finally happened. My conscience stopped working. I've never felt so free
He Facebook stalked his way right into my pants.
Moment of the night: you were impatient while I paid for the tequila shots and proceeded to lick and salt MY hand for me. This is why we're roommates.
Why am I getting texts saying are you ready for this butthole? Help
This is not a costume party, I'm just wearing fairy wings.
Of course you are.
It's whatever. I just want to see his dick again
I'm going to fake an anxiety attack to get to the front of the line. Save me some brisket.
Good. Sleepy. In the middle of a pregnancy scare. The usual.
she hacked my macbook and downloaded an illegal version of the original pokemon red, completely nude in my computer chair. there were several levels of hornyness existing all at once
We just stood outside and debated the existence of mermaids for about 20 min. Is this what too drunk is?
Randomize
