so then we both started to do the walk of shame and she didnt realize we had fucked in her apartment until some lady said hi to her in the elevator
you didnt stop her?
too entertaining
We couldn't even have sex we were both laughing so hard. I don't know how I feel about the quality of that weed.
Look at the bright side...I have an 11 inch penis
He won't stop licking me..... im choosing your date next time.
She sat on the stairs and yelled sex positions at us. I don't remember if we went along with it but judging by the beer and condoms I'm thinking yes.
They just called to see if he wanted to come in at 2am for overtime. He's trashed. He literally carried on a 10 minute convo with his boss about woodchucks. As in the animal
We were on the balcony tossing jello shots to people passing below
When people said no i'd yell "i tried them i promise they aren't roofied!"
I think cutting a patient out of a owl costume is a first for those guys. It's a good story at least.
Hahaha I can already see the arrest warrants. It's gonna be beautiful. I'll get them framed.
You ninja crawled over five sleeping guys to get in my room at 6 in the morning to wake me up for sex
...and I think that may just be my favorite moment in our fuckbuddyship
Surveying the reception hall and I'm fearing the worst possible thing that could ever happen...this might be a dry wedding.
.,.,you might have to leave
OH MY GOD did i pee on you?!
My history professo slid into my DMs. Granted I did give him “fuck me” eyes during a lecture a few times.
I've decided I will have no shame for the things I don't remember doing.
OMG OMG OMG Ive hit the penis jackpot
It seriously took everything in my power not to sleep with him
What did it come out and serenade you? Lol
It sang to me in the dark. It was magical
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