You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
i perioded on his leg
on. his. leg.
I love how you are more concerned with what i call my penis than the fact i wanna bone some high school chicks
Just blew a perc off the traytable on my flight, spring break has begun!!
please visit steve this weekend, he is getting mature and responsible and shit which scares me.
The investigator asked if we were sharing a pitcher of margaritas. I corrected him and explained that we each had our own.
now that you've tased me I refuse to buy you flowers
Bitch, I been tryna reach you all day to talk to you about these Dorito tacos.
A guy in the dance floor is raising the roof with an axe in hand. I love Halloween.
So I bring Danny back to the apartment for the first time and my roommate is curled up in the beanbag in the middle of the floor, wearing nothing but her uggs, high out of her mind and watching Harry potter... She offered us kettle corn.
He asked if he could come over tomorrow....
Do to my newly discovered condition I'm having to resort to emergency beat sessions to avoid the temptation to text girls I know are easy slams.
I was less embarrassed asking him to torrent the teen mom's porn. I'm not gonna ask him to about season 4 of PLL.
We can't go out this weekend. My uterus is so desperate it's given me permanent beer goggles
Thank you for trusting your ovaries to me
Just got thrown out of the club for making condom water balloons. I'm not ashamed.
Randomize