Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
There's a 34yo winking at me. Why do i find this weird when my bf is a 38yo married man?
The only birthday messages I got from men were from my 8th grade boyfriend and the bouncer at our bar. I think I'm doing something wrong in life.
My right arm is handcuffed to my leg... Please help.
Did you guys have sex yet? And don't worry, I broke the ice already by sending this to both of you. So you can just jump right into it. You're welcome.
Was it a good night or a bad night when you have to apologize to someone the next day for trying to fuck them with a turtle?
he peed on his own floor last night after we left the bar. pretty much sums up how i feel about the evening
I have a cut on my head from a tambourine.
I really wanted to pound but her roomate was making mac n cheese n shit so I was trying to time her moans to the drone of the microwave
Just caught myself checking an online porn site while in a strip club. Might have a problem.
He's still short.... And probably a douchebag. But if we ever run into him downtown I fully encourage you to take him home and have "I hate you douchebag" sex and lick every inch of that disgustingly toned chest.
THANKS BE TO BLACK BABY JESUS IN HIS LITTLE GOLDEN DIAPER FOR BLESSING ME WITH NOT PREGNANT
I JUST GOT WOKEN UP TO HIM PISSING ON ME SAYING "IT HAS TO HAVE WATER TO GO TO THE BATHROOM" AND AFTER HE FINISHED HE DIDNT REMEMBER DOING IT
You drunk? Cause I have a terrible idea...
It was probably bad to sleep with someone just to pet his dog right?
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