That level of neurosis does not find love outside of Grey's Anatomy.
how do u look a man in the eye when u own both his daughters V-Cards?
I have way too much money in my bra to be responsible.
The musician playing at the bar just puked inside his acoustic guitar, then sang an encore performance. I love Louisa!!!!
just found the land before time on youtube... I'm so fucked for finals
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
Oh, and my friends believe you should reimburse me for the brazilian that was gone to waste.
was it you or me who tried to make the, what appears to be, nacho cake in the oven?
Woke up and there was a kayak in the pool. Are you alive?
I want to get my vag crammed with complete loss of every bit of dignity I have left by this man from every angle on every flat surface that exists. That is all.
What if our hands were octopus tentacles?
You're an idiot.
She's dipping the chocolate graham crackers in marshmallow vodka for a 'campfire taste'
STOP PUTTING PICTURES OF JONAH HILL IN MY KITCHEN CABINETS!
i just ran butt naked down the hall and someone highfived me. i love college.
I've scurried myself in your trunk come find me in the morning
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