Went to gas station for smokes. three cops pulled in. got gas i didn't need. found diff gas station.
good choice.
im so glad i don't have to work tomorrow. I'm spendin all night on the new call of duty.
Wow. That's the gayest thing you ever said.
Look man i'm staying in playing videogames and growing a beard. Its not like i'm trying to get a girlfriend.
He said finals are more important than getting stoned on 4/20. I'm proud in a disappointing kinda way
I found her under my bed eating airplane pretzels.
I just watched her pee in a trashcan, im still probably going to fuck her, what does that say about my standards
Hey, can you come over and kill me real quick
Dude squirt doesnt even begin to describe it i thought she was the lost portal to atlantis with how much she let out
you told that cab driver that when the 3 of us come togehter it means happiness and love
Sitting in back of morning lecture drinking a daqueri from my pink unicorn cup. Pretty sure the girl next to me smells it.
Don't mind me. My boyfriend is carrying me because I'm broken not because I'm drunk.
It's not even 9:30 yet..
I have alcoholic tendencies but you know what? College
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
He caught me shoving meatballs into my mouth using my hand. Fuck utensils. It’s Christmas...and this is why I’m single.
They are good meatballs.
At Target. Everyone is stocking up on food and flashlights for this storm. I stocked up on beer. Dont judge me, it was on sale...
On a scale of having tea with Ghandi to the apocalypse how bad of an idea is it to drink with a 100 degree fever?
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