Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
were not allowed back there because i puked on the waitresses foot while trying to order another round. for myself.
He is like that thing on the menu you would eat because nothing else looks remotely edible.
Gross thing of the day...i got cum in my new boots
Going to get tested monday. You're coming with. Bonding time, slut style.
There's people holding up abortion signs everywhere. I guess the people of Florida want you to remember you fucked up on Spring Break.
This soccer player girl is eating this banana WAY to slow. Too early for penis shaped foods.
Lesson learned. Never get fingered on an airplane.
Was just told that I was slipped 2 hits of acid in my in flight drink before takeoff. 8 hours to Germany wish me luck
Just in case you were wondering I sent you a text at 4:37 in the morning because I woke up on the side of the highway at that time
Slutty costumes are my most sacred holiday tradition! Wearing a not-slutty costume is like putting cheezwiz on a communion wafer.
Apparently, acid is a good substitute for cash if you don't have any! Who knew?
He seduced me by making me nachos. It worked.
Thanks for not letting me get involved with a serial killer. That's true friendship
Dude I cant right now. Were talking about pickles.
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