Small dicks are the new regular sized dicks.
And surprisingly enough iPhone does not have an app for Russian mail order brides.
He took naked pictures of me and told me if I ever got to the Disney Channel level of fame he would help me out. I think i'm in love
i'm drunk and confused. there might be a 4 year old here.
Dont eat ANYTHING off the floor at Matt's house. He likes floor sex.
You left for an hour, then walked up to us at the bar, pulled 80 dollars out of your bra and yelled " drinks are on him".
It's like hey here is one penis enjoy nothing but that for the rest of your life
Well at least the house will be decorated when u get evicted.
Also, my aunt grabbed my phone and downloaded the scriptures. Apparently I need Jesus.
this night just went from meh to biblical thanks to drunk naked yahtzee
It's like you know you got fucjed up when you wake up and check fir your own pulse
It's a good thing he's hot, because it seemed like he was trying to do CPR on my private parts
How do you ask the man who gives you multiple orgasms if he has friends who could do the same for your friend?
You think I could convince him that having sex with another girl isn't cheating?
Hey Girl, we got home safe!
I know, I drove you
Randomize
