I had never watched a guy jack off to me before, but let me tell you, it was a very uncomfortable experience.
Kinda felt bad though cuz she whimpered and shuttered a lot, i felt like i was kicking a puppy, only the puppy liked it and came a bunch
I elbow dropped a bag of ice to break it so we could make margaritas. I bled everywhere. Be proud.
Thanks, college. Tonight's decisions brought to you by margs in a nalgene.
EVERY guy that's EVER been in my vagina has texted me tonight for a booty call. Narrow it down to the greatest hits or just work in timeline order?
i love you man. i hope we fuck some serious shit up this summer.
I'm eating tortillas right now. Like not cooked tortillas. Someone is playing the guitar. Man with bandana.
I do NOT want to date a man who has no interest in going to a kangaroo farm
Idk I'm sorry it's weird to ask for testimonials on your penis
Just bailed on her the best way possible. Got tickets to the game. Only issue is.... if we lose, we not only lost, but I skipped sex to watch us lose
Drunk you needs to learn how to call sober me, so sober me can talk your drunk vagina down.
We're gonna start a pole dancing competition or a bar fight. Stand by for results.
Also I like oatmeal more than sex.
Typical. We're ready to go, and you're not wearing pants.
Our Uber driver pulled over to show us Tinder some dick pics. Top that.
Randomize