I just walked in on my mom and dad......It wasn't my dad
I hope whoever gets these locks of love doesn't have a drug test anytime soon
i got excepted to unl lol
You mean "accepted".
I dont care about anyone or anything else I just want to make love to you on my air mattress
Every single time I start thinking that we shouldn't have done that to him, I think of his ballsack in our passed out faces. No sympathy.
When you start quoting save the last dance you need to stop drinking
sounds like it. if it makes you feel better i blew up a $75000 farm tractor last night.
I only listened to his story about leaving the Amish community because I was hoping for a free drink
he could've at least fucked me twice. that's just common courtesy.
STOP WHATEVER YOU ARE DOING AND GO OUTSIDE RIGHT NOW. THE MOON LOOKS LIKE CATWOMAN
took over 12 bombs tonight and we still aren't hooking up. Wait how am I functioning
"Work from home" is code for "morning drinks" right?
ok so i took my anxiety medication and i'm eating junior mints and i think my vagina will be ok
Just so were clear your wife is cut off from my dick.
So many questions so I’ll prioritize. How did I survive last night?
Randomize
