Thursdays are my worst days
but now we sippin champagne when we thirstay?
that girl looks like she smells like hot dog water...
So I went out tonight...met a guy who slightly resembled my dad,huge creeper, he asked me to "hang out" so I gave him my moms number since he was more her type:)
When I realized it was a dog, and I still had a boner, it was awkward.
We started snorting MDMA at 3 in the afternoon...it was never going to end well.
The lid of our salsa is promoting a contest that ended in July '09
I want to hold her baby but I'm afraid I'll give it a contact buzz
okay - we take $20 and buy each other some 'drink till we puke' clothes from the thrift store.
I mean, that's eating your cake and fucking it too.
That's not fair! You can't come over after you just had sex and rub my dry spell in my face!
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
I think the fact that I stole someone's mail and broke my big toe means that I should consider taking some time away from vodka
I know I'm moving in six days but getting wine drunk and laying in bed just sounds so good right now
How are you feeling today?
Like Satan handed me a grenade and ass sandwich.
HE WAS CUMMING IN THAT DICK PIC
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