I think we should urban dictionary "drive of shame." It involves a sprint to your car in his underwear and shirt, surreptitiously trying to put on your bra on at stoplights without attracting attention from neighboring cars, and lurking in your car a block from home so you can know when your roommate leaves for work.
He kept starring at my ass and repeating "Its Just a beautiful piece of artwork."
Cute you're picking friends over dick. I feel like this is the trailer for a lifetime movie.
just looked in the mirror, I fell asleep with a face mask on. At least drunk me cares that much about the condition of my skin
it's like doing a sit-up... but, you're inside someone
It was as if you forgot how to speak normally. All of your words came out either backwards or in song form
I dove into a random van at the bar as the door was closing and ended up at some house with people I've never met in my life dancing in a basement
second roommate of the year to get clamydia. go life.
We had sex on the beach. I was completely naked except for my sneakers. That's when you know
i was on the fire escape while he ate me out for a while before i realized he had shut the door behind us and locked us out and i proceeded to climb down the stairs and climb back into the party through the window.
i can only hope to be on your level one day.
He was so drunk and proud of his 6-month-gym-results he actually made me touch his whole naked body.
I just want to hook up with Ed Sheeran. Why does it have to be so difficult?
I just talked comic books with a cop. We high-fived as he was running my name.
Proud of you.
We discussed the legality of being a vigilante. I won.
sometimes i forget what nice tits i have and then i spend a month brushing my teeth naked in the front of the bathroom mirror, and i remember.
You were up on table in a neon bra chanting "YOUR MOM" while drizzling vodka on your chest...
no wonder i woke up with my boobs stuck to my bra
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