That adds atleast one bjs worth of awkward sexual tension between us.
My BOSS just pulled out a box of Christmas stuff labeled reefs.
Just showed mom and dad the pics from San Francisco, while i played the Full House theme song in the background.
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
I never want to hear the words unlimited shots for boobs in the same sentence ever again.
walk of shame this morning involved walking through the in-home daycare that she runs while it was full of kids. judgemental little shits. on a plus, got a juice box and a graham cracker for the walk home.
The Angel on my shoulder is now resorting to merely reminding me that, "You will regret this later." I'm not sure if he's learning how I think or just giving up. Either way, should make life a bit more interesting.
I'm gonna have sex with my clothes on and I'll know everyone there so I'll be in my comfort zone
there is vomit in the pocket of my dress coat. i remember thinking "this is a weird place to puke" at some point in the evening, but i dont understand how i did this.
There is not enough soap in the world to make me feel clean after last night. Im gonna need jesus for this one
We were coming but I found wine on my way out the door.
Dude too much vodka. I think I just puked up my heart
That's what you get for taking that guy home. The god of sluttiness is frowning upon you.
I'm going to start using the hurricane naming system for my hangovers. Hangover Agatha is a real bitch today.
There's a baby in the strip club. I say again: THERE'S A BABY IN THE STRIP CLUB
My date ended with her leaving the bar with that guy who used to jerk off in the back of the school bus.
Randomize
