NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
i'm unexpectedly in a limo, eating poutine. the driver just offered me coke. good idea?
Oh well shit happens. This is my not worried face. This is also my still decently drunk face.
I wish we couldve been like jesus and the desiples tongith
This is the most scared i've been of my hands since i did shrooms.
Tomorrow, if I don't look at least 5% better than I do on a regular day to day basis, I want you to hit me and tell me that no one will ever love me if I continue to look like I just rolled out of a cocaine induced hibernation. I'm asking you for tough love.
You didn't even properly utilize my pigtails.
Don't forget ur talking to the master juggler. Remember that time I slept with 3 guys and made them all pay for plan b? Paid the rent didn't I?
Pack light, we're going straight to bar from the train. No place to put our shit.
Dude all I'm bringing is my dick and a phone charger.
Once I hang curtains in my truck bed that'll be feasible
Regret, thy taste is box wine.
The only math I use in every day life is figuring out how much I can spend on alcohol and still have money to pay my bills. High school lied to us.
Apparently we don't communicate very well unless we're drunk and/or naked
Three Decembers later, I'm looking at this fuckin Santa lingerie I bought and just realized my stocking never got stuffed....
Want to help me interview candidates to replace my Cub/Boy Toy when he leaves for grad school next month?
Randomize
