This is the first month I have not taken plan B to get my period in over a year
And somehow that makes me sad knowing I haven't had raunchy unprotected sex in a month
Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
I drank myself into bisexuality again.
Howd you meet this guy?
I found him next to my pants on sunday morn.
Thanks for making breakfast. I usually have cereal and coffee...but i think margaritas and turkey sandwiches could catch on.
Why is the word 'best' written on my chest?!!
I really wish I had added "blowjob on a slide at a playground" to my bucket list before last night.
I think i can hear god laughing at me and yelling "thou shall pay for thy habits of underage drinking" through a megaphone directly at my eardrums
That's not a good night. A good night is waking up with no skirt, no money, and the imprint of the edge of the bar on your forehead.
Sounds like it could have been the night you pulled out your love stump at the strip club.
He told me his cum shot melted the paint on his bedroom wall and asked if I want to see it
thanks again for a nice night (and please don't fuck my boss)
I apologize in advance for the amount of cleavage I'll be exposing your boyfriend to.
Nothing says "i love you" more than flowers and potatoes
you missed a good time last night.
you texted me at 10 telling me to come fuck you, that says enough.
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