You are possibly the most enthusiastic, likable bad influence I've ever met.
you always know who the new freshman are on fb because theyre always wearing prom dresses
Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
Just barfed in my hand. Needless to say, this day is off to a great start
i feel like im playing gay clue. i have to figure out where i am, who took me home, and what he put in me
Tortellini makes me feel like I'm eating hundreds of little vaginas
It's 4th of July all over again, we were chasing with the pool water.
can you blow me for old times sake
only for old times sake
Oh no, we smoked the revival weed. It came in a Batman bag. It hit like justice. And orphans.
Now I have the walk of shame to give the receptionist the bathroom key back, I've had it for 20 minutes. I should just smile and wink. She knows what went down.
Pain in my heart, regret in my vagina
Just fyi there is a naked girl somewhere in your house. I woke up and she was gone, definitely left her clothes tho
party devolved into two exes battling with Cal's tiki torches, and the lawn being set on fire kinda sorta and then we all hula'ed... hulaed?
I was trying to drink every time they said planned parenthood but my body isn't cut out for this.
We had sex on the tiger blanket while I was wearing my Ukrainian shirt and my ass touched the Ukrainian flag. Happy 25th Ukraine!
Randomize
