I'm at a Rock of Love themed party. New high? New low? I can't tell.
Wait. Scratch that. It's not themed. These girls are just sluts.
oh there is nothing like the 1st beerbong of the school year
i just rolled a joint on the giving tree. that book has given me so much.
Grown men dancing to Spice Girls and a girl wearing one shoe. I belong here
At the time, making out with dudes for keg money seemed like a genius idea. Now I realize it was borderline prostitution.
bring the dog... nobody goes to jail with a dog.
You were great dude. You wanted to charge the guy with fedora $100 to get in.
Dude, you went to another fraternity's formal as a joke and came home with one of their dates. AND you managed to get her number. Please explain to me how that's not a good night.
Look. When I let you cum on my tits don't fuck it all up by going "SKEET SKEET SKEET" it just pisses me off.
You tried paying your tab with the coaster
apparently when we were gone the parents play strip connect 4
I came home braless and wearing a tail....
If my plane goes down do me a favor. Break into my house and get the batman costume and swing out of my bedroom.
I wasn't talking about him I meant his penis! Its not a pet
Oh. Well it should be. I like petting it.
Holy. shit. Chris has no pants on. In public. Fuck. Need you.
Randomize