Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
I admire the strength of friendship we have that allows for sharing husbands.
then she woke up from sleeping for an hour and the first thing she said was "i regret it already"
she keeps The Day After Pill in her bra... there is a God.
i've never smoked before...when you said wake and bake i thought you meant like a funeral bbq or something
How can he have such a manly penis and baby hands?!
Just puked up hair, tacos and vodka. Hello Memorial Day weekend.
you're expensive. Idk about all this. What happened to free make outs?
Sobriety and mild self-respect
I swear 95% of pictures on my phone are from drunken nights I don't remember with me doing a peace sign alone in somebody's bedroom.
You know, having a conversation evolve from attractive men to roommate orgies would be weird with anyone else, but you get me.
I just contemplated drinking cheese dip. And by "contemplated," I mean "attempted and was forcibly stopped from."
I'm at the bar, forgot my pants. Everyone's over reacting
Can I even tell you how badly I want a day that is just on and off napping and sex with intermittent snack breaks? Because I want that day very badly.
I have never seen a more amazing text message in my entire life.
why is "bang the student affairs grad assistant" the third highest thing on your semester goals list
THIS MOTHERFUCKING ROOSTER
IT KEEPS CHASING ME BACK IN THE HOUSE
FUCK THIS BIRD
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