how was that guy you hooked up with?
i used to think blowing a .05 was a good thing
she passed on me to fuck the foreign guy. is there a manlier, slightly less gay way of saying "always the bridesmaid, never the bride"?
nope.
i just hugged the lady at the liquor store goodbye for the summer...
Just because Aaron is a gender neutral name does not mean I am letting you name your baby after a drug dealer
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
You're getting spoiled, you better send me at least a side boob pic if you wanna see my dick dressed up as Davie Crockett.
I snorted a few ambien and woke up here. A lady banged on our door, waking us up, demanding our towels.
It's sitting in bleach right now. You will be the creepiest coolest dude in my book if you made a bracelet from my tooth.
Now that weed is legalized There needs to be reusable bags for people to pick up with. All this plastic is so bad for the environment and a waste
i was giving head the other day and thought of your all penis tastes the same quote and couldnt stop laughing
She knew the head wasn't all that so she gave me her taco. I'm will in to give her a second chance.
i woke up this morning put my hand under the pillow and there was a banana there
You keep making the old jokes & I'm gonna come down with a sudden case of low-estrogen related vaginal dryness..
If the smell of things stopped me from putting things in my mouth. I wouldn't be popular with Grindr guys.
I'm trying to cause a divorce, your hooking up with a felon, I think we need Jesus.
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