Tonight I think I'm going to go out with a french braid so I don't wake up with puke hair. Thoughts?
And your mom thought you weren't even thinking about your future... she would be proud
just found deep spiritual meaning in spongebob.... that high.
Just because it's been in my vagina doesn't mean it's important to me
He won't let me have sex with him, but feels bad if I won't let him get me off. It is the weirdest, best, most confusing pseudo relationship I've been in.
So on how many levels of wrong is it that I'm reconsidering my divorce simply because I don't want to go through getting used to shitting around someone again.
You do realize there's a subtle difference between not remembering your outfit from april 17th of last year vs forgetting that last night you undressed in the street and were grabbing every dick you could reach, right?
Excuse me but the alley way I wanted to fuck in happens to be a very nice clean area.
You screamed "I NEED TO GET THE WHOLE SET!" and then proceeded to try touching everyone's balls in the room
that almost beats the chick I saw smoking a joint while uni-cycling past my house at 4am. Almost.
it's like i'm making a family tree of tunnel buddies for my vagina
By god, his vagina is better looking than mine.
We have sober sex! It's a real relationship.
she crawled a good forty meters just to whisper in my ear... "dildon't"
I have to have boobs, you have the charm and wholesomeness that gets boyfriends... And i have boobs
He really is. Owns his own house and has more than one towel!
Randomize