Is it gay to rub my penis between my butt cheeks and pretend that they're tits?
Wow! You need to get laid.
How do i write this on his wall without making it sound like he gave me an std?
He's trying to wipe up all the spilled drinks with a banana
i took my goldfish out of his bowl last night and put him in my bed
At the end of the night you handed the bartender a piece of paper with the word "VISA" written on it.
You tried to call "time out" during the sobriety test.
You would not believe how incredibly hard it is to climb on top of a three story apartment buildings roof from the air conditioning unit
Someone left their drag queen on my couch. On the plus side, he sure does know how to make a mean cup of coffee.
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
Right now he's sitting in the chair pointing to me to go away. He's trying to have quiet time with his penis.
her wearing orange crocs at the bar was definitely a great form of contraception
It's ok, it's locked within patented Sealrite technology. That puke is staying fresh
Nah it's alright, I'll just ride cock all the way to hell
We were looking everywhere for you and I finally found you in the closet talking to a build a bear.. So I gave you and myself another drink
when i was on the highway she passed out and knocked my transmission into nuetral with her forehead...that was an experience
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