puked in the new hous. now it's officially home.
He gave me the "I've pictured you while jerkin off" look
found inexpensive tickets to Norway. Questioning if its legal. PLEASE tell me you remebered the walkie talkies and face paint.
We can't bring brittanys dog so we are getting high and getting in my bathtub I think it's pretty safe
You think posting ushers "let it burn" video on his fb page is in bad taste? haha
My arms are sore from holding up pukeahontas for so long
I don't text first unless I'm hammered...so ya I text first a lot
is there a way to sugar-coat "shes in jail" when someone is texting me asking where their friend is?
Number of twigs I found in my hair: 5
After my date left I rallied and took the Asian girl home. Flexibility my friend.
I bought Plan B for the first time and an interview outfit today. You could say my life is improving.
I'm upset for all the future generations who can't drunkenly get cheesy bread
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed
She asked what a chaser is. I died a little inside, please come back..
So, looks like I managed to leave my bra in the boardroom after all the sex. FML.
Randomize
