please tell me I'm in your upstairs bedroom. Just google mapped myself and I have no idea where I am.
talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
I wish everyone walked around campus with a video of what they did this weekend above their heads.
No, that was before the police came, but after the hooker.
I just saw what sperm look like swimming around. I'm not happy with what you've put in my stomach.
I may have been hammered and in a wheelchair but I definitely remember asking the hospital reseptionist to marry me
Life lesson learned last night, if you are too drunk to use the atm leave the strip club
Need a travel agent to tell me which countries in Asia have legalized prostitution for New Year. Fireworks would be cool too.
I'm going to see if it catches on fire again, then I'll make the decision.
Hey had an urgent voicemail from the Illinois national guard....have you been using my identity for your blackout weekend?
Yes and yes
So Monday we're lesbians.
Deal. This decision is final and any rebates on this will result in losing an eyeball.
I am now being bribed with one orgasm per every meal I eat. This is the best anorexia therapy ever
I don't know anybody that can get the cops to drive them back to the bar after being pulled out of a tree
it happenes
I'm the only person who goes to break up a friends with benefits and comes out with a boyfriend
I think after tonight I'm 85% lesbian
Randomize
