i mean you're really good at taking the morning after pill...so you could put that on your resume..
yeah, i think fast in a bad sitatuion and am able to react with appropriate measures
I wonder what it would be like to be a slice of cheese.
God. I look like such a fucking stand up guy wearing polo shirts. You would totally trust me not to date rape you.
I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
He was wearing a Knicks jersey I had to go home with him. it was a rough season.
Going to get a "plan B"urrito
I don't care how high you are, you can't finger me while eating potato chips.
The sun is so bright. Whhyyyyy. EYES ARE DEAD.
Drunbk and roasting marshmallows on my stove. Accidentally singed the catr's fur but she'sd alright.
Random question, but did I leave a spoon on your dresser last night?
I'm covered in European cum. How's your day going?
Do pleather leggings scream im easy on a first date?
I'm using my dog as a pillow. He's cool with it.
Just recreated a sandwich from the caf in my own kitchen. Graduation denial at it's finest.
I don't need my coworkers thinking I'm a nutcase.
You gift wrapped a tampon.
Randomize
