butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
You told the cops that they couldn't arrest you because they weren't hot enough to fuck
I think even Ryan Seacrest is disgusted with the thought of Ryan Seacrest getting some.
Somewhere out there, someone is getting laid. And then theres me, watching Star Trek porn while my roommate plays World of Warcraft next door
part of it is the fact that im problem drinking, and the other part is my OCD wont let me leave the bottle half-empty.
The preggo girl brought her pet chipmunk to class today. fyi.
he keeps trying to sext me and all I can do is respond with descriptions of what im eating.
I just banged your sister. Thats what you get for takibg my lunch money in 2 grade, boom, boom fiyyaa powaa
When the nurse referred to my vag as "your downstairs", I knew I found the perfect Doctors office.
its gotten to the point where if her hand isn't on my butt i think we're in a fight
I could drive to your house and kick you in the nuts right now....and not even stop for a burrito
Being responsible doesn't make memories.
If she gets mad at me, that only means more free time for me. I like to put myself I win win situations. Despite being in a relationship, I still find ways to accomplish my goals.
He tripped and fell all the way to the ground and then stood right back with out spilling a drop of his 3/4 full glass of rum and coke. It was like watching something from the matrix
he called her and asked for me. he wants to do dinner and a movie
her booty call wants to take you to dinner?
Randomize