Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! Live in the flesh!
I was just handed a mimosa the size of my head. Stay tuned.
frankly if you're gonna get kicked out of your place, hooking up with your gay roommate's boyfriend would be the most entertaining way to do it.
Well if were past the bullshitting stage yes if not then no I'm not that kind of guy
Also, I imagined that his bacne was bubblewrap and that made it much more tolerable
I'm just sad for you. It sucks that the 17 douchebag asshole guys you're fucking can't morph into one nice, normal, non-alcoholic guy that has a drivers license and no criminal history.
I recently had a rabies scare because I thought putting socks on my hands to pick up a squirrel that got in my house was a good idea.
Hey don't blame me, picking what flavor of condom to put on my dick is a very difficult selection process
He used pronouns for his penis while sexting. I don't know what I did to deserve this.
I ate too many pot brownies and passed out topless with my boobs painted like the American flag
I impressed him by taking off my panties without removing my pants.
I’m a lady. I promise I won’t oogle your junk when we go skinny dipping.
My conscious state is steadily increasing towards drunkenness.
Point in my hangover when I'm honestly not sure if I'm about to puke, or shit my pants.
Randomize