Porn is love you can see.
dibs on John Mayer's hood pass
a price tag just fell out of my vag. i guess its worth $13.99...
He was eating her out on the elevator. What a good man.
Do you think I could put your penis on reserve for tonight or tomorrow night?
I imagine her to be like a 19th century explorer/adventurer with different boys' hearts on her wall like animal heads
Like Teddy Roosevelt
The melted ice in my drinks tonight is probably the most water I've had in like 3 days accumulated.
I'm glad we're going to catch up. too bad it's over my vagina.
Just sucked a bong hit straight from my girlfriends mouth & pretended I was a Dementor. Life just 87% more like HP.
Sit down my child. It's time you were told of my famous loss-of-virginity story entitled, "The Penis that Never Could."
If I do nothing else today, the fact that I talked you into this is achievement in itself.
You don't know true terror until you get stuck in a porta potty while frying your face off.
Whatever. I just want to indulge in this mcchicken and forget all about his tiny penis.
dude, he literally lasted one minute. and i paid 8 dollars for cabs.
I'm just going to tell you this I knocked up your girlfriend. I didn't mean to I thought it was somebody else I wasn't drunk but it was dark.
The truth is better her than my wife.
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