i never thought i'd have to say "please stop having sex on me"
wow.
yeah, it was that bad.
you have no idea how wierd it is to get nudes while talking to grandma
False alarm I know hes alive because when i tried shaking him awake he pissed his pants and rolled over..
can we get vodka so I have an excuse for being an emotional wreck
he just hooked up with some chick in a bedroom upstairs so I just went to sleep in the pantry closet...
I'm sorry that I didn't get belligerently drunk and did not put my penis on your neck again
I AM CRUING IT IS 93:2 AM AND I AM CYGIN INT BED
That guy was drunk and couldn't get it up so he just tried to scissor me.
he BROKE his KNEE while we were getting it on, called 911 and the ambulance that showed up contained two paramedics, ONE WAS HIS FUCKING SISTER!!! HOW IS THIS MY LIFE?!?!?!
Poor life choices...?
Her ex was at the party her housemates were having. He knocked on her door asking how she was while we were going at it. Turns out they were trying to work things out. Don't think I'll ever forget his face when we walked out of her room.
No I kepy moaning and just called out a name to make them believe I was actually having sex instead of masturbating.
I'll accept that I'm a woo girl. Just not the drunk cowboy hat wearing bar mongering twat bag type
We were in bed, and he looked at me and asked if I'd be weirded out if he took his leg off. BEST.SEX.EVER.
OMG OMG OMG I just throwed up in his pillow case when he wentto start the sho wer, time to grab my bra and bounce!!!
Wow.
How early is too early to start day drinking? Asking for a friend
About five minutes ago. You’re good now.
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