Raise your hand if you bought 2 annoying girls shots of water. CLOWNS.
This girl in my class is wearing a sweatshirt that says "LEAD ME NOT INTO TEMPTATION" ahaha I almost just laughed out loud. We could never be friends
she took her bra off and it was like the puppet strings had been dropped. her tits totally deflated.
no, literally. he fb chatted me and said "since you're online i figured we could bang tonight?"
im not 100% but im pretty sure at some point i was rubbing ur bf's beard telling him how magnificient i thought it was
Drunk in a canoe getting pulled by a lawnmower thinking of you
So I was about the only one NOT pregaming or stoned at my aunt's funeral... Maybe thats why I'm the black sheep.
Woke up covered in green glitter and beer. I am never leaving Ireland.
Dude I broke her toilet blowing some dude. I wasn't going to turn down the 300$ he offered to fix it.
Pencil dick carries the name proudly.
Alex I've come up with a new medical condition. dick depression. it's a real thing and I have it
It's Jesse McGoddamn Cartney, the whole world sings that shit
Ladies don't puke and tell
Straight up last night my mom was like josh you need to find a job that doesn't include the selling or transporting of drugs
Lunch?
Massage?
Spanking with handcuffs?
Randomize
