Finally jerked of with a banana peel.
he was pretty good aside from the whole putting his tongue on my butt thing
Corey Haim died. 80's me is so sad
The panties match.
I'll be right there.
Oh my god please beg your father to turn the car around so you can possibly get laid by a knight at medieval times.
Im drinking in homer but I guess Egan got arrestest on an "assault by water ballon" charge but tom actually threw the water balloon in question at the bartender.
As i was blowing him Silent Night came on his iTunes. I said "it isn't christmas" and he moans "yeah it is."
Him cheating on his girlfriend resulted in a $1500 hospital bill from repeated blows to his testicles by my ass. They diagnosed his pain as "testicle trauma". Sex karma at it's finest.
nothing says "fuck you jocks from high school my life is better than yours" like bringing 5 grand in 20s to the bar
Waffles and pussy, what else is there?
Appreciate the offer but I'm a huge fan of penis
I'm slacking. We've been hooking up for months and I have yet to bang him while he's wearing the clown mask.
Dentist appt at 2pm get milk poured on my tits by 2am
A marvelous 12 hours
You can come over but I have to warn you that it is naked Sunday.
We’ve got a propane heater on our back porch if you want to come over and eat a McRib in peace
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