4:33 am: Sleep on left side of my bed. T-shirts are second drawer on left side, boxers top right. I don't wake up when lights are on so feel free in my room..
I don't know if you realize how depressing it is to get your card denied....when you're only spending $4.
I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.
My printer just jammed because one of the condom wrappers I threw when we had sex in my dorm
it's a drink the shower water kind of morning ...
Wake up. We're going shopping for booze and samurai swords.
I lied. Can't workout today. Only exercises I'm currently capable of doing are breathing ones to keep last night's drinks ending up all over the classroom.
i went out at 5pm and cant remember anything until 3am...i was at the bus stop parking lot running around doing the Arrested Development chicken calls.
I feel like one thing if I have going for me is that my bed looks like a nice place to have sex
We were fucking and his phone rang and it was his grandma. He just had a conversation with his grandma while fucking me from behind. Then his dad called and asked him what he wanted from taco bell.
SINCE WHEN WAS USING A FROZEN WATER BOTTLE ATTACHED TO A ROPE AS A THROWING WEAPON A GOOD IDEA??
But can mardi gras accurately capture the essence of my tiny rage?
The police report said i was screaming at someone that wasnt there, then the cops told me to call someone sober and i called mike to tell him "They are trying to arrest me for stealing information from the FBI" at that point they took me to jail.
I just realized I have a habit of pre gaming for therapy visits. Problem?
We'll discuss it when you get here
I just set my mike's hard down and didn't want it to spill, so I held my finger up and told it to shoosh. I'm drunk.
Randomize
