i puked in the mini-firdge
we don't have a mini-fridge?
bought one. it ws too cheap to pass up. xcept now there's puke in it,,, but the freezer's fine so i feel pretty good about that
How much cunt could a cunt bag punch if a cunt bag could punch cunt?
the girl next to me in class is drinking a margarita out of a slurpee cup. i know your going to ask how i know its a margarita and the answer is i can smell the tequila. i never want to leave this place
He took a banana and in front of everyone showed her how he wanted it done.
I'm in the liquor aisle and a 10 yr old boy yells, "My favorite beer is Corona! Daddy remember when you gave me some on our camping trip?"
pouring popcorn down my shirt before we went to the bar was the best idea ever. it was delicious and convenient.
I don't think I'm emotionally ready for this blow job.
once you started introducing yourself as "running-bear" i knew you were beyond fucked up
So i am officially handcuffed to the pole on the party bus while taking jello shots.....this shall be an interesting night
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
How do I tell your little brother I lost my virginity wearing nothing but his socks?
Formal letter or email.
After getting all 4 of my wisdom teeth removed I asked my dentist how much better would I be at head
i'm not saying you're gay. i'm just saying all my gay friends think you have a great ass.
She's passed out with a slice of pizza between her boobs should I just eat it and leave
It's become almost a Pavlovian response. The sound of the vacuum being run by hubby causes an instantaneous involuntary orgasm.
Randomize
