8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
My cousins just decided to make a catapult to spread my Grandpa's cremated remains. I love my family.
i don't care what she did to you. we are not having sex in front of your sister.
Who has a video camera? i want to look back on this one day and say OH thats why i spent 2 years in jail
I literally sat down and peed with my underwear still on. How does that happen?
not much just sitting outside his bathroom door naked eating cheetoes. You?
I'm just going to say , cocktail races are not for a Wednesday night maybe not even a Friday type of deal
I'm glad I booty called you last night. It was nice to see you and talk, in between all the sex...
I wish him all the best and hope one day he can afford the surgery to remove his head from his ass
This is worse then when all the pharmacists sang me happy birthday while I was buying plan b
Pretty sure I just puked up sand. And nothing else.
I woke up on a navy base in a different time zone. I'm never leaving tallahassee again.
took shots off of a myriad of fake boobs last night. It was glorious.
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
You don't know happiness until you've got to smoke weed inside taco bell and then eat all you want for free
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