I want to stick my p in your. b.
You just kept yelling "SATAN!" at me every time I walked by
This girl told me I had the balls of an infant..I replied by saying her vagina looks like Stargate.
he told me that if i wanted to smoke he could make a piece out of my shoe. were keeking this kid around
You passed out in my bathroom last night. I put a towel over your face so I could shit without it being gay
I'm trying on my bridesmaid dress so that I can determine what will need to be done to achieve getting fucked while wearing it.
Should I take my grandma to a keg tomorrow or not? Serious question
So because I'm off tomorrow that means your dick could be in my mouth majority of that time
got a blowjob in the bar bathroom, got arrested for public intoxication, and found a big bag of weed on the ground on my walk home from the station. my friday night could have been a movie
Well I had to use a seat cushion at Soul Cycle today so, yeah, I'd say the sex was good
Ended up in his bed... He's passed out holding me and his bulldog is laying across my legs. Both snoring. HELP!! I wanna go home!
It's very rude to dive mouth-first into someone's crotch without knowing if their wife is cool with it.
I'm still mad from all the stupid shit he's done this week that even though I couldn't give two shits about Vday, I'm gonna throw an epic tantrum if he doesn't morph in to Nickolas Sparks for a day
So I love answering sex questions in intimate relationships class on a clicker when im sitting next to my cousin..
she said she was so hungover this morning in a way that sounded like she was apologizing for thinking she was attracted to me last night...
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