Can't talk. I'm at the Tulsa Sheriff's office with a bunch of rednecks. I bet I'm the only one that voted for Obama.
I bet you're the only one who could read the ballott.
If my vag had twitter, what do you think it would say?
i have the juiciest gold medal in my pants
There is somethin about your sexuality that makes my dick do jumping jacks when I see you
Theres a baby at this concert double fisting pacifiers. shes gunna do great in college.
Reggie can tackle my bush.
she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
You missed out on a serious adventure. Cops were called. We put a chicken in someones house.
Hold on, I gotta pump breast milk for the white russians.
Maybe I'm a robot.
You can't be that drunk already
I'm going to die alone in my chair and get eaten by my cat. That kind of break up.
Its official the day you get back into town we are having a going away to jail party for me. My last wish before prison is to shit faced drunk with you, get into a fist fight, and then cuddle up and fall asleep. Just like old times <3
I mean if you can't appreciate a good looking dick then just get out.
It was like sex on an active volcano surrounded by the night sky and bloodhounds. And by that I mean it was nice.
My sister and her gf showed up at my door with no pants on at 4 AM talking claiming its hot.
Randomize
