Why do I feel like I used to feel when I almost got caught looking at porn when I get caught looking at facebook at work
I don't care how ugly she is, I can't turn down a free movie +bj. In this economy that's downright irresponsible
i'm sorry, i thought "hey, she wants TO FUCK YOU" was a good enough cue
Never visiting again. You guys drink like immortals
I think i just threw up blood. i can't chill right now;
This is the third time that ive slept with him. He bought me more milk. I can feel the romance growing.
She cracked her neck before the blowjob and I knew shit just got real.
I feel like on the last day of finals we should run around campus dressed like Moses screaming "LET MY PEOPLE GO!!!!"
I'll start the recruiting
By the power invested in me i promise you hot wedding sex at my wedding.
I'm still laying in bed cuz I don't feel like adulting yet
Btw, I feel the need to make sure we have no misunderstanding about this. So here goes. I'll happily mess around with you again. However, I probably won't do it while you're dressed like a creepy clown. Or any clown.
Was he a virgin!? DID YOU TAKE A GUY'S VIRGINITY ON MY FLOOR!?
i have nothing going on in my life. unless a toxic love triangle with netflix and jack daniels counts.
Can we relax the "married man" rule just once?
That cat I follow on Facebook beat cancer so we're drinking tonight in celebration
Randomize
