i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
Mat is currently running around his basement "trying to catch oxygen in his mouth."
I just realized my mom and I make the same noises when we have sex. Fuck.
he left his wallet here so lets treat ourselves to a lunch for the lack of penis we both had deal with
He did the "not my house dance." Apparently it involves spreading cereal on the floor and then grinding into the carpet in bare feet while singing "not my house" over and over and dancing.
We're gona eat taco bell and then take exlax and see who can hold it in the longest. Loser has to pay for drinks all weekend. You in?
Oh my god. You have got to get off that breast feeding support group. They're on to you, dude.
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
I haven't been this unsober in a long time. I feel like I am observing myself. Like I am a test subject for alcohol. I wish my brain would shut up and let me be a normal drunk.
It's twenty thirteen and the rando and I bonded over the fact that we're both stil using flip phones. Of course I fucked him in the bathroom. It was the obvious thing to do.
Last night was just a whirlwind of Mario Brothers and sex.
So, i might have left my morals back in 2011.
I feel like any time there's that much rope, lingerie, and horse masks on the ground, it's safe to say it was a great night
like I'd leave you in a situation like that..pfft. what kinda friend do you think I am?
...a stoned one.
Greetings from Florida; the armpit of the US, where my 240something lb brother nearly got carried away by some aggressive woodland mosquitoes. I was only spared because they could probably sense I was currently semi-disassociating and would not feel the suffering their presence wrought.
Anyway, how was your day?
Randomize