I just did the classiest thing ever.
last time you said that you got chlamydia.
I caught a rooster roaming Edison Park then released it in the bar. They made me try to catch it again and somebody played the chicken dance while I chased it
going to the gym drunk. fuck whoever made basketball season and getting a spring break ready body in the same season.
I had to drink a couple beers this morning so I could attend the keg race. Hangover had to dissipate or it wasn't happening.
I heard an explosion in the backyard. You told me you were playing "will it burn".
We were in the hot tub...he ate the pizza pocket directly out of my mouth
he's definitely still old enough to be your dad. even your grandfather, if you come from a line of juvenile delinquents
No, your dick is problems. Anyone you fuck haunts us for the rest of the semester. If you need to get laid, I'll personally drive you out of state.
I am so excited I do not know how I will sleep.
It's like the Christmas morning of dicks
I stuck my fake eyelashes to his balls after he passed out.
Whatever it's Canadian jail, it's not like Guatemala or something. It'll be nice and cushy and they'll probably throw him a big bday party with all his friends and strippers
I think anything that happens between 12 and 2 am is just sketchy enough to be a good idea.
Just leave a note saying "riding dick see you in the mornig"
Science requires me to take a picture of your nipples.
So was this before or after he cried about trump?
After
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